Perks of reaching 50 or being over 60
and heading towards 70!

01. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

02. In a hostage situation you are
likely to be released first.

03. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

04. People call at 9 pm and ask, did I wake you?

05. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

06. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

07. Things you buy now won't wear out.

08. You can eat supper at 4 pm.

09. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

10. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

11. You quit trying to hold your stomach
in no matter who walks into the room.

12. You sing along with elevator music.

13. Your eyes won't get much worse.

14. Your investment in health insurance is
finally beginning to pay off.

15. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists
than the national weather service.

16. Your secrets are safe with your friends
because they can't remember
them either.

17. Your supply of brain cells
is finally down to manageable size.

18. You can't remember who sent you this list.

And you notice these are all in
Big Print for your convenience.

Just A Note:
Never, under any circumstances,
take a sleeping pill
and a laxative on the same night.

Forward this to every one you can remember right now!